Although the term “social distancing” is supposed to convey the same feeling as physical distancing, it fails to capture the loss that many of us are experiencing as a direct result of being separated from other people. This rings particularly true for teens.
Even while in households full of people, it seems as if some young adults are emotionally disconnected more than previous generations, and it’s concerning researchers.
It’s not a new problem. Loneliness has been a growing issue for many years, with more than 61 percent of adults in the United States admitting to feeling alone all the time even before shelter-at-home mandates were put in place, according to the Pew Center.
While keeping to ourselves helps prevent coronavirus’ spread, humans are social creatures and prolonged isolation takes a toll on our mental health, particularly within the sector of the US population growing into their formative years (15-24).
The BBC Loneliness Experiment, an expansive global study, recently published its results, revealing that self-reported loneliness is highest among young people, particularly those in “individualistic” societies.
And this loneliness is just not self-professed. It can actually be seen in the brain.
One study found, for example, that when mice, a social creature like humans, are stuck in cages by themselves, it changes their brains’ basic composition and causes nerve cells to reduce in size.
Another study pointed out what social distancing during the pandemic has been doing to humans identified that the neural underpinnings associated with isolation are similar to those of feeling hungry: to say you’re “starving for company” isn’t that far off base neurobiologically speaking.
The advent of social media hasn’t made it much easier with virtual contact with strangers and friends to simulate the effect of true connection, but only provides a band-aid solution to loneliness.
So how do we help the young people in our lives feel like they’re not alone?
Encourage them to be open-minded
It’s easy to let an age gap get in the way of building a friendship with someone, or maybe divergent political beliefs, conflicting relationship perspectives, or differing tastes in movies or music. But Don’t. Remind your GenZ’er to allow more people an opportunity to befriend them until they show reason to do otherwise. Even one common interest can be the gateway to establishing a closer connection.
Show them how to be a good friend
Shonda Rhimes got it right with her hit book, The Year of Yes when she explored the power of accepting invitations. She wrote, “If I don’t poke my head out of my shell and show people who I am, all anyone will ever think I am is my shell.” In order to get invited to things (in-person or virtually) , you have to show up and respond to outreach in a timely manner.
You can tell your young loved one to consider volunteering time for worthy causes, particularly those that help others who may also struggle with loneliness. Additionally, it’s great to offer emotional support and genuine attention to friends and acquaintances.
Give them words of encouragement, remember their special milestones and lend a listening ear. Because as we all know, a little empathy goes a long way.
Remind them to trust first.
Perhaps the easiest tip to offer a lonely gen z’er is to share something personal about themselves (that they feel comfortable sharing) and be courageous enough to extend the first invitation to an event or social outing, even though there’s a possibility they’ll get turned down. It’s not the end of the world.
Overall, none of us are meant to be alone. Connections with other people help us grow as fully evolved beings. As the world slowly begins to return to normal, remind your teen that although it’s encouraged to physically distance themselves from others, it’s still important to cherish the relationships they currently have and invest time in building new ones.
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