As a young woman, sometimes trying to understand what truly makes a healthy relationship can be tough. I’ve been in good, bad and ugly relationships, so I have experienced it all. When I met the love of my life, there was something very different that stood out about our relationship to me, and it remains the glue that keeps us happy and healthy.
My relationship with my boyfriend doesn’t revolve around a physical connection, but better yet a mental one. Our intimacy with each other starts from our energy-based connection built by a friendship and personal values.
Having started off in a very long distance situation, he in Los Angeles and I in Atlanta, we were forced into getting to know one another on a very deep level via the phone. Suddenly, what went from a physical attraction and the exchanging of numbers, blossomed into building a friendship and bond like I had never had with anyone else.
We spent hours on the phone (literally 5+ hours) every day learning about the other, asking questions, giving advice, telling embarrassing stories, and discussing hard but necessary topics. It didn’t take long for either of us to realize that we were dealing with our soulmate. This foundation of a mentally stimulated connection has made our relationship stronger than we could have ever asked for, and it makes intimacy between us come easy.
If your relationship has gotten to a roadblock and the only way to get turned on is through physical connections, try some of these non-sexual acts to get the love flowing back between you.
Sex in the bedroom can’t fix a broken or dulled down relationship, but intimacy can.
1. Flirt – Send a cute text message, or write a playful note to your significant other that just lets them know how you feel and that you are thinking about them. Compliment them when you see them looking good. Remind them of how sexy you think they are.
2. Date – Do a fun activity together on a regular basis. Pick a day that works for both of you and designate it as your date night. It gives you…
something to look forward to each week, and a reason to spend some quality time together outside of the bedroom.
3. Hold hands – I still get butterflies inside when my boyfriend grabs my hand. We do it so often, you’d think I’d get tired of it, but it means so much to me. We hold hands at dinner, when we are walking, and when we are driving. It’s like we are sharing a connection through energy that we both can feel.
4. Go for a walk – Being in nature can be one of the most relaxing things you experience, but to do it with your partner can be therapeutic to your relationship. If you guys are in a heated argument, try taking a minute to gather your thoughts and then continue the conversation outside on a walk. You might be surprised as to how calming it can be.
5. Dance – It might sound goofy or even stereotypical, but dancing really can get your connection going with your partner. Turn on some of you all’s favorite slow jams and enjoy your time in each other’s embrace.
6. Exercise – Sweat together and stay together they say! Exercising as a couple can not only be motivational, but it shows commitment to more than just each other, but each other’s health as well.
7. Take a moment of gratitude – Each day I take out 5 minutes to think about what my boyfriend has done today to make me feel appreciative of him. I then am sure to communicate this to him whether, it be when I see him, or via a random phone call or text. I can tell he likes it when I call him with something sweet and simple to say.
Beauty and hair maven Naomi Mackenzie is a freelance writer and business consultant. Her passion is to continuously keep up with the ever-evolving techniques and topics as it relates to skin and hair, while helping others to embrace their own definition of beauty in a healthy way. Her blog, KissTheChaos (www.KissTheChaos.com), shares both an educated and personal perspective, seeking to spark ongoing discussion. Follow her on Instagram at @oOolala_laa and on Facebook.
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